Stress Management
Don’t let somebody else’s problem become your own.
Causes of codependency:
A person is more likely to become codependent if he or she:
* Puts other people’s wants and needs before his or her own
* Is afraid of being hurt or rejected
* Has low self-esteem
* Feels responsible for the other person’s addiction or behavior
Self-help tips:
* Focus on the three C’s:
– You did not Cause the other person’s problem.
– You can’t Control the other person
– You can’t Cure the problem.
* Don’t make excuses for the other person’s behaviors. Accept that he or she has a problem and needs to get professional help.
* Refuse to come to the other person’s aid. That means no more bailing them out of jail or giving them money for drugs or booze. If your loved one is a problem drinker contact Al-Anon and Alateen at 888.4AL-ANON (425.2666) orwww.al-anon.org.
* Get help for verbal, physical and/or sexual abuse. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233).
* Take care of your own feelings, desires, and needs.
* Set and stick to limits on what you will and won’t do.
* Find diversions to keep you from obsessing on your loved one’s problem.
Get help.
Most codependents don’t think they have a problem. They see themselves as loving, caring people just trying to help. Counseling may be needed to help them regain a healthy life.
Action Step
Find a meeting for codependents from Co-Dependents Anonymous at 888.444.2359 orwww.coda.org.
© American Institute for Preventive Medicine