HealthyLife Articles

Tag: Parenting

  • Telling Kids About Tragedy

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of parents talking to their child.

    Talking to kids about scary events and disasters is important when they’re old enough to understand. Kids may have more fear of an event if they don’t know any details. They may imagine something much worse than what happened.

    Although telling kids some details may help, the American Academy of Pediatrics says it’s important that you filter the information you give your child. Think about the child’s age, personality and what they will be able to cope with. These steps can get the conversation started:

    *Ask the child what they know about the event.This can help you separate facts from fiction. It gives you a way to explain the things they already know in a way that is direct but not scary.

    *Avoid any graphic details.Although the media may share lots of details that are graphic and scary, children should be shielded from these things.

    *Don’t be too vague.Saying “something happened that was bad” doesn’t give enough information. Instead, name the place where it happened and tell them that some people were hurt. The police/firemen/ government, etc. are helping people and working to keep us safe.

    *Keep it open ended.Tell them if they have any questions, they can ask you.

    Is your child coping?

    After a disaster, some children have a hard time coping. These red flags may be a sign that your child needs help:

    *  Trouble sleeping, nightmares or being very tired all the time

    *  Unusual aches and pains, such as headache or feeling “sick” often

    *  Appetite changes

    *  Social changes, such as aggression or being clingy

    *  Frequent feelings of sadness or fear

    Talk to your child’s doctor if you notice any of these changes.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Helping Your Child Succeed At School

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of school children with backpacks.

    Although learning may be easier for some children than others, any child can find success at school with some extra help from their family. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends these tips to help your child get a great education.

    Make reading a priority.

    Reading to your child helps them become a better learner. When they’re old enough, let them read to you. Don’t let reading be a chore. Make it a fun time for them by allowing them to choose books they enjoy. If they have difficulty reading aloud, offer to take turns reading to give them a break.

    Be involved.

    Ask your child about their class, their friends, and what they like about school. Attend parent-teacher conferences. If you’re concerned about how your child is doing, ask the teacher how you can help.

    Get them to bed on time.

    Children need the right amount of sleep for learning and good health. Lack of sleep affects the immune system, brain, and emotional control. To find out how much sleep your child needs, visitsleep.org/articles/how-much-sleep-children.

    Power their bodies with healthy food.

    Be sure your child eats a healthy breakfast each morning. Pack their favorite fresh fruits and vegetables in their lunches. Avoid soda and sugary drinks. A healthy diet can boost energy levels and help them stay alert.

    When a child is too sick for school

    Your child gets up in the morning and says she doesn’t feel well. It can be difficult to decide when your child truly needs to stay home, especially if  she doesn’t appear sick. In general, a child should stay home if she:

    *  Has a fever greater than 99.5 degrees

    *  Isn’t feeling well enough to participate in activities

    *  Has an illness that could spread to other children

    *  Has no appetite

    *  Has diarrhea, vomiting or nausea

    Often, you’ll have to use your best judgment to decide if your child should go to school. If he seems “not like himself” or you’re concerned about any symptoms, it’s usually best to play it safe and keep him home.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Tips For New Empty-Nesters

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of couple sitting in front of their house.

    Busy parents may dream of the day when they can have time to themselves again. But sometimes when the last child leaves home, parents are left with feelings of sadness and loss. This is known as “empty nest syndrome.”

    Empty nest syndrome happens to many parents. But, there are some ways to help prepare for it and cope with it once it happens.

    Pick a hobby with your spouse.Having an empty nest means you and your partner have more time to do fun things together. This can help you improve your relationship too.

    Get support from friends and family.Talk to those who have been through the empty nest experience.

    See a doctorif you think you may have depression.

    Stay in contact.Talk to your child over the phone, in texts, or online whenever you can.

    Look for new opportunities.Have you been putting off taking a class, working toward a promotion, or other interests? Now may be the time to try it.

    Experts point out that an empty nest isn’t always a time of sadness. Many parents find they enjoy their newfound freedom, according to the American Psychological Association. With today’s technology, it’s easier than ever to stay in touch. And many parents are excited to get more time for their own goals once their children are grown.

    Source: Vanderbilt University Child and Family Center

    Not-so-empty nest

    The number of adult children living with their parents is higher today than ever. Between 2005 and 2011, the percentage of young adults living in their parents’ home went up, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. The percentage of men age 25 to 34 living in their parents’ home rose from 14 percent in 2005 to 19 percent in 2011. For women of the same age, it rose from 8 percent in 2005 to 10 percent in 2011.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • How To Make The Grade This School Year

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of a group of school children.

    Start talking about the upcoming school year. Listen closely for fears or concerns, advises Dr. Amie Duncan of Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. “It is important that parents listen to and respond to their child’s potential anxieties about the new school year, especially if they are making a big transition such as from an elementary school to a middle school. It is perfectly normal to experience first day jitters,” she said. These feelings can be relieved with some of these suggestions.

    Preschoolers and kindergartners need to know what will happen.

    *  Visit the school together. Let them play on the playground, walk through the classroom, and meet new teachers.

    *  Go on a school shopping trip for a backpack and supplies. Assign a school prep area at home for supplies and lunchboxes.

    *  Tuck a small family picture in a backpack or lunch.

    *  Set bedtime and wake-up routines 4 weeks before school starts.

    *  Be positive and excited for the new school year.

    Elementary and middle-school children will need to adjust to new beginnings.

    *  Expect that your child may want trendy or “cool” school supplies.

    *  Take a quick trip to school before classes start to help find classrooms, lockers, the cafeteria, and the bus drop-off location.

    *  Right from the start, help your child get and stay organized. Choose places to store their backpack and a distraction-free area to complete homework.

    *  Talk to your child about high-risk behaviors, such as drinking, drug use, and sexual activity. Have this talk early and often.

    *  Encourage your child to choose to take part in at least one school club, sport, or other activity outside of school hours.

    *  Don’t hesitate to make an appointment with the school counselor right away if you have concerns about how your child is adjusting to school. Keep the lines of communication open.

    High schoolers need and thrive on positive reinforcement.

    *  Help your teen set realistic goals on how to earn the best grades and complete assignments.

    *  Stay organized. Buy a daily planner and teach your teen how to use it correctly or teach them how to organize their schedule with a tablet computer or laptop.

    *  Encourage your teen to get involved in at least one extracurricular activity or sport because it will help them meet people.

    *  Continue to support and encourage good study habits with regular homework/study times. Search for ways to offer positive support.

    *  Ask about what’s going on in your child’s life. (Use open-ended questions, rather than those that require only a “yes” or “no” response). Be an active listener without judging your child.

    *  Stay involved in your child’s school life and you will know what is going on, and how they are doing.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Tips To Help Kids Succeed

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of kid holding an 'A' graded paper with thumbs up.

    Parenting is not an easy job, and it seems there are thousands of ways to do it. With so many parenting books and techniques available, how do you know what works? Sometimes, it helps to go back to the basics. You don’t have to be perfect or read every parenting book on the market.

    Years of research from medical experts says the following parenting tips will help keep your kids healthy and happy:

    *Be loving.Kids need love every day. Tell them you love them and give hugs and kisses.

    *Give them comfort.If a child is scared, help them to feel safe. Take steps to protect them and help them cope with fears.

    *Spend time with them.Set aside time each day to focus on them, and put the phones and devices away during this time. Point out good things they do. Be specific. For example, you might say, “I’m really proud of you for cleaning your room without being asked.”

    *Be a good listener.No matter what the topic, kids will feel valued if you look at them and listen to what they say.

    *Use a routine.Kids like to know what’s coming next. Set times for bed, meals and simple chores to help them feel secure.

    *Forgive mistakes.Help them by saying what they could do next time to avoid the mistake. Don’t criticize them as a person by saying, “you were bad.”

    *Have rules & stick to them.Parents, babysitters and other caregivers should follow the same rules. Don’t change them or let certain people break them. This only creates confusion and can lead to behavior problems.

    Even with the best advice, parents may need help from an expert. This doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent. Sometimes, talking to someone who can help makes a big difference. If you feel you need help with parenting, try the following resources:

    *  Your child’s pediatrician

    *  Your own primary doctor

    *  Local parenting classes at hospitals, schools or community centers

    *  A family counselor or minister

    *  Online support groups

    Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help. It’s a sign that you want to be the best parent you can be, and that’s a good thing!

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • How Was Your Day At School?

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of mother and her school-age child.

    Students are back in school, and now is the time for parents to develop routines to help their children succeed academically. Kimberly Greder, Iowa State University Extension and Outreach family life specialist, says parental involvement, more than income or social status, is a predictor of student achievement.

    *  Create a home environment that encourages learning. Set high but reasonable expectations for your kids.

    *  Get involved, with your kids, in school and community activities. Ask about homework. Visit with teachers and school counselors. Ask them what you can do at home to help your kids succeed.

    *  Ask your kids about their day at school.

    *  Encourage reading at home and be a role model.

    *  Watch who your kids hang out with. Make sure they are doing healthy activities.

    *  Get your kids involved in activities or sports to develop leadership skills and positive communication and conflict resolution skills.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Turn Off, Tune In

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of family sitting on couch watching TV.

    Parents, turn off the television when your children are with you. And when you do let them watch TV, make sure the programs stimulate their interest in learning.

    That’s the advice arising from University of Iowa researchers who examined the impact of television and parenting on children’s social and emotional development.

    The researchers found that background television-when the TV is on in a room where a child is doing something other than watching-can divert a child’s attention from play and learning. It also found that non-educational programs can negatively affect children’s mental development.

    Best advice:Sit down and watch a TV show. When it’s over, turn off the TV.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Lightening The Load: Dividing Household Chores

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of couple ready to clean.

    Chores are a part of daily life for families. And, the way they are divided can have a big impact on your family relationships. A survey by the Pew Research Center found that sharing household chores was among the top three things that make a marriage work.

    This can be easier said than done in many households. Many families have to work outside the home, attend kids’ activities and deal with other demands every day. With all these things taking up time, chores may be an additional source of stress.

    First, have a good talk

    It’s easy to get angry or upset with someone for not doing enough chores.

    But before you do this, stop and think. Did you clearly tell them when and how you wanted this chore done? Have they been busy with other activities?

    Be kind and respectful when talking about chores; then you may find that the other person is more willing to take part. Try to look at things from their perspective. Perhaps they’ve been overwhelmed with other things or simply didn’t know that something needed to be done. Or, if you feel like you’ve been doing most of the work, ask if others can help take some things off your plate. Be specific with which chores you would like them to do and when.

    Get the kids involved

    Even small children can do chores. Toddlers can pick up toys and help make their beds. Preschool kids can help clean up spills, feed a pet and even take their laundry to the hamper. Older children may be able to wash dishes, and do laundry and fold clothes.

    Younger children often do well with a chore list so they know what is expected of them. If they can’t read yet, use pictures and stickers.

    Set aside a few minutes

    One strategy that works for many families is finding just 10 or 15 minutes a day to do some basic chores. This can be anything that needs to be done. Examples include picking up and putting things away, cleaning a bathroom or running the vacuum. You can even set a timer so it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. Make it fun by turning on music while you clean. Or, make it a “race” with little ones: who can pick up their room first? When the time is up, everyone can feel good about helping out around the house.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • Video Warfare

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of two kids playing video games.

    Children learn from video games, say Iowa State University psychology professors. So parents may want to shop smart when choosing games for their children. Even if the content is unrealistic or cartoonish, kids learn good behaviors (playing drums) or bad behaviors (aggressive tactics) by practicing.

    Professors Craig Anderson and Doug Gentile-leading experts on the effects of video games on young people and authors of the book Violent Video Game Effects on Children and Adolescents, say, “Parents and researchers initially believed that what mattered most about violent games was how realistic and bloody they were. Our research now suggests that what matters most is whether you have to harm other characters to advance in the game.”

    Follow their advice to parents before making a video game purchase for children:

    *  Play the game, have someone else demonstrate it for you, or look at clips from the game on the game’s website.

    *  Then ask yourself the following questions: Does the game involve some characters trying to harm others? Does this happen frequently, more than once or twice in 30 minutes? Is the harm rewarded in any way? Is the harm portrayed as humorous? Are nonviolent solutions absent or less “fun” than the violent ones? Are realistic consequences of violence absent from the game?

    Two or more yes answers should cause parents to think carefully about the lessons being taught before purchasing that game for children. Some sports and fun music games may be better choices than warfare games.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine

  • No Family Dinner? Other Options To Try

    FAMILY LIFE

    Image of laughing family as dad feeds daughter a piece of fruit.

    Today’s families are busier than ever. Parents’ jobs, kids’ activities, social events, and homework seem to leave little time for anything else.

    Research shows that sitting down as a family for dinner is good for everyone at the table. The Family Dinner Project says sharing a family meal is good for the brains and health of all family members. But some families simply can’t make this happen every night. So what should you do? Don’t give up on finding time for each other. There are other options for family bonding that don’t need to happen at the dinner hour.

    *Consider breakfast.If everyone is home in the morning, why not take a few extra minutes to enjoy a family breakfast? It can get everyone off on the right foot.

    *Try weekend lunches.If dinner only happens once or twice a week, weekend lunches can be a great choice too. A picnic outside in the warmer months makes for a fun change of pace.

    *Think about your schedule.If you can’t get everyone together for a meal at least twice a week, consider rearranging activities or saying “no” to some commitments. The benefits of family meals together are worth the effort.

    © American Institute for Preventive Medicine